1 00:00:04,930 --> 00:00:06,150 Seriously, you're gonna have to go faster. 2 00:00:07,930 --> 00:00:09,940 - I'm pregnant. - Did you just say pregnant? 3 00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:11,010 Hi. 4 00:00:11,080 --> 00:00:13,440 You've got what's called cervical dysplasia. 5 00:00:13,500 --> 00:00:16,230 - What the hell is that? - It's what we call a pre-cancer. 6 00:00:16,290 --> 00:00:18,240 - Cancer! - I think you should marry me. 7 00:00:18,280 --> 00:00:20,740 What? 8 00:00:20,810 --> 00:00:22,730 Oh, God! Hurry up! 9 00:00:22,790 --> 00:00:23,810 I'm not gonna come! 10 00:01:17,830 --> 00:01:19,500 - Hi. - Hi. 11 00:01:20,600 --> 00:01:23,640 - Do you wanna go for a walk? - Sure. Where do you wanna go? 12 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:26,550 No, I mean, do you wanna go for a walk? 13 00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:28,720 Oh, you mean on my own? 14 00:01:28,810 --> 00:01:30,830 Yeah. I don't want to be mean. 15 00:01:30,880 --> 00:01:34,150 I just need some space, and you take up a lot of space. 16 00:01:34,230 --> 00:01:35,260 - Oh, yeah? - Yeah. 17 00:01:35,340 --> 00:01:37,520 You're the second biggest thing in this flat after the bed. 18 00:01:37,590 --> 00:01:38,860 You're bigger than the wardrobe. 19 00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:40,580 That's because your wardrobe is a joke. 20 00:01:40,660 --> 00:01:42,800 It's not a joke. It's roomy and practical. 21 00:01:43,100 --> 00:01:46,050 If it's so roomy, then why are my clothes still in my suitcase. 22 00:01:46,130 --> 00:01:47,240 It's roomy for my stuff. 23 00:01:47,550 --> 00:01:49,290 You let me put my penis in your mouth, 24 00:01:49,370 --> 00:01:51,280 but you won't let me put my t-shirts in your drawer? 25 00:01:51,350 --> 00:01:55,520 Please don't rush me, Rob. 26 00:01:55,610 --> 00:01:57,160 Okay. How long do you want me to go out for? 27 00:01:57,260 --> 00:01:59,040 Just, you know, You decide. Just. 28 00:01:59,460 --> 00:02:02,040 Couple of hours or half a day. Not long. 29 00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:04,560 So I'll just go get some coffee. 30 00:02:04,630 --> 00:02:07,930 Yeah, but don't just get a coffee and come back. 31 00:02:07,990 --> 00:02:09,350 Maybe go and see a movie. 32 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:11,840 - It's 8:30 in the morning. - I don't know. 33 00:02:11,910 --> 00:02:14,700 Just improvise. There's a whole world out there. 34 00:02:14,790 --> 00:02:16,860 Okay. I'll get some groceries. 35 00:02:16,930 --> 00:02:18,100 - Yeah. - Um, 36 00:02:18,150 --> 00:02:21,080 You're out of mint tea and those weird raw food bars that you like. 37 00:02:25,390 --> 00:02:28,050 - So, I'll just head out then. - Take your time. 38 00:02:34,560 --> 00:02:36,350 Get out of the way, fucking idiot. 39 00:02:36,870 --> 00:02:37,960 Jesus! 40 00:02:58,520 --> 00:03:02,650 - What are you looking at? - A dog's shitting asshole? 41 00:03:12,360 --> 00:03:14,370 - Hey, Mom. - Hey, baby, how you doing? 42 00:03:14,440 --> 00:03:16,440 What time is it there? Are you okay? 43 00:03:16,530 --> 00:03:19,370 Oh, yeah, it's 4 a.m., and I couldn't sleep, so-- 44 00:03:19,430 --> 00:03:22,470 I finally looked up this thing on the Internet, 45 00:03:22,540 --> 00:03:25,680 and you do not have to stay there. 46 00:03:25,740 --> 00:03:27,210 It's a different country. 47 00:03:27,560 --> 00:03:31,460 They can't extradite you for failure to pay child support. 48 00:03:31,530 --> 00:03:33,120 It's not like it's a war crime. 49 00:03:33,200 --> 00:03:35,360 It's just a foreign baby. 50 00:03:35,450 --> 00:03:38,190 It's not a foreign baby. It's my baby. 51 00:03:38,300 --> 00:03:41,120 Your grandson. I'm a dad, so I can, 52 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:42,970 at the very least, give it a shot. 53 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:45,440 - Your father didn't. - Jesus, Mom. 54 00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,260 What does that have to do with-- 55 00:03:49,070 --> 00:03:51,270 Mom, I gotta go. It's a guy I was trying to call. 56 00:03:51,630 --> 00:03:53,260 - I'll call you back. - Rob! 57 00:03:54,370 --> 00:03:56,000 That fucker hung up on me. 58 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,510 - Hey, Dave, - Rob! 59 00:03:58,000 --> 00:03:59,470 You pants-shitting homo! 60 00:03:59,540 --> 00:04:01,200 What's happening? You live here now? 61 00:04:01,610 --> 00:04:03,000 Yeah, for the time being. 62 00:04:03,060 --> 00:04:05,560 - Is it for work? - Well, it was at first, 63 00:04:05,650 --> 00:04:08,450 but I wound up getting a girl pregnant. 64 00:04:08,500 --> 00:04:12,510 Whoa, you mean, like, underage? 65 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:13,880 - No. - You said girl. 66 00:04:13,960 --> 00:04:17,040 I meant an adult woman, a teacher. 67 00:04:17,089 --> 00:04:20,459 Oh, God, that fucking sucks, dude. 68 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:22,200 Not really. 69 00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:23,680 You need a job? You need money? 70 00:04:23,760 --> 00:04:25,160 No, I have a job. 71 00:04:25,250 --> 00:04:27,520 I'm calling 'cause I don't know anybody here. 72 00:04:27,600 --> 00:04:29,340 Shit, man! Let's get together. 73 00:04:29,390 --> 00:04:31,400 Your situation sounds fucking awful. 74 00:04:31,450 --> 00:04:33,080 I'd love to hear more about it. 75 00:04:33,170 --> 00:04:35,950 Well, Great. Can I come over now? 76 00:04:36,420 --> 00:04:38,990 No. I gotta go to the Ukraine for business from a couple of days. 77 00:04:39,070 --> 00:04:40,480 Let's do something when I get back. 78 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:42,410 Hey! You like the ballet? 79 00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:44,690 - Yeah, sure. - Fag! 80 00:04:44,760 --> 00:04:46,200 I'll call you when I'm back from Odessa. 81 00:04:50,400 --> 00:04:51,720 Oh, God. 82 00:05:01,630 --> 00:05:03,980 - I know I was only gone an hour-- - 50 minutes. 83 00:05:04,050 --> 00:05:06,070 ...but I bought you one of these. 84 00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:10,550 It's bread, but it's all wrapped up like a present, and it only cost 17.50. 85 00:05:12,780 --> 00:05:13,800 I love it. 86 00:05:16,540 --> 00:05:17,710 And... 87 00:05:19,550 --> 00:05:22,530 - Ta-da! - Oh, that's so sweet. 88 00:05:22,610 --> 00:05:24,030 I know, I'm selfless. 89 00:05:27,280 --> 00:05:29,700 - What are you doing? - I'm just being dainty. 90 00:05:30,860 --> 00:05:34,320 - You're squashing me. - Really? How? I'm just a sprite. 91 00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:36,000 Really, seriously, you're hurting my arm. 92 00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:38,150 - Just get off. - Okay, sorry. 93 00:05:44,240 --> 00:05:47,020 In fact, it was such a long and brutal war 94 00:05:47,100 --> 00:05:49,400 that some people even resorted 95 00:05:49,460 --> 00:05:51,610 to digging up bodies and eating them 96 00:05:51,710 --> 00:05:53,990 just to stay alive. 97 00:05:55,530 --> 00:05:58,510 Oh, you think that's funny? Well, let's hope you never have to choose between 98 00:05:58,590 --> 00:06:00,760 digging up your grandmother and making a sandwich out for her 99 00:06:00,840 --> 00:06:02,040 or starving to death, Jason. 100 00:06:09,060 --> 00:06:10,430 I think it's amazing what you're doing. 101 00:06:11,180 --> 00:06:12,900 - What am I doing? - You're just like, 102 00:06:12,970 --> 00:06:14,550 "Fuck it. I'm single, "I'm getting old, 103 00:06:14,630 --> 00:06:15,650 and I'm just going to have this baby, 104 00:06:15,720 --> 00:06:17,840 because I'm the boss of my life." 105 00:06:18,190 --> 00:06:22,120 I'm not doing it on my own. Rob asked me to marry him, so I'm going to do that. 106 00:06:22,180 --> 00:06:23,650 I thought it was just a one-night thing? 107 00:06:23,720 --> 00:06:26,980 It was six nights. He was a six-night thing. 108 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:28,960 Why do you want to get married? 109 00:06:29,130 --> 00:06:30,550 Because I'm pregnant. 110 00:06:31,410 --> 00:06:33,400 If I got married every time I got pregnant-- 111 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:34,740 Do you know what I mean? 112 00:06:35,160 --> 00:06:38,520 - It's not the 1930s. - No, it's the 2000s. 113 00:06:38,580 --> 00:06:40,840 There's like 300 wars happening around the globe. 114 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,070 I might like someone to shovel a path for me 115 00:06:43,130 --> 00:06:45,870 and my baby in the nuclear winter. 116 00:06:45,960 --> 00:06:47,870 Well, just don't rush into it. 117 00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:49,680 Have you seen the new deputy head? 118 00:06:50,340 --> 00:06:52,150 Tell me you don't want to squat on his face? 119 00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:55,330 If you're married, you won't be able to do that. 120 00:06:55,410 --> 00:06:57,520 Yeah, I will. It'll just be harder. 121 00:06:57,620 --> 00:07:00,860 Show us the ring, then. 122 00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:03,560 Do you like it? I don't have one. 123 00:07:06,040 --> 00:07:08,720 That was my friend. 124 00:07:09,410 --> 00:07:12,360 That was just my friend Dave texting to invite me over tonight. 125 00:07:12,420 --> 00:07:14,480 Oh, you don't have any friends. 126 00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,670 I've changed. I have friends now. I'm putting down roots. 127 00:07:18,130 --> 00:07:20,930 Who knows, your brother and I might hit it off and be friends, too. 128 00:07:21,390 --> 00:07:23,890 We might be better than friends. Be more like brothers. 129 00:07:24,280 --> 00:07:25,510 Well, that would make you my brother. 130 00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:28,120 Hey, love doesn't follow rules. 131 00:07:28,200 --> 00:07:30,270 Ha! I don't love you. 132 00:07:33,570 --> 00:07:35,770 - Are you going to keep it? - Oh, I don't know? 133 00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:38,360 - Are you going to keep yours? - I've already invested in them. 134 00:07:38,430 --> 00:07:40,640 They've got braces and stuff now. They're worth money. 135 00:07:40,710 --> 00:07:43,010 I hate to break it to you, "Mr. Three Kids Before You're 30," 136 00:07:43,070 --> 00:07:45,320 but they're a little bit harder to make when you're old. 137 00:07:45,640 --> 00:07:47,880 Older. You know, I can't just rip it out 138 00:07:47,950 --> 00:07:49,870 and plant another one back up there when the time's right. 139 00:07:49,940 --> 00:07:53,570 Well look, I'm just bowled over by your whole new life here with Ron. 140 00:07:53,990 --> 00:07:56,040 - It's Rob. - Oh, sorry. 141 00:07:56,540 --> 00:07:58,300 But I just want you to know, if anything goes wrong 142 00:07:58,370 --> 00:08:00,180 and you do succumb to the cancer, 143 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:02,040 your son will have a home here. 144 00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:04,560 Millandra and I will raise him. 145 00:08:04,660 --> 00:08:06,660 - You're having a boy? - Yeah. Yeah. 146 00:08:06,940 --> 00:08:08,620 Oh, you are having a boy! That's great! 147 00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:10,510 We'll absolutely raise him, in that case. 148 00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:13,180 - Well, don't get too excited. - He's just winding you up. 149 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,750 - So, Rob, are you working here? - Yes. 150 00:08:15,810 --> 00:08:17,750 I work for a U.S. advertising firm, 151 00:08:17,810 --> 00:08:19,790 and I'm opening a London office. 152 00:08:19,860 --> 00:08:21,950 A lot of our clients want an agency that has a presence 153 00:08:22,010 --> 00:08:23,460 in both the U.S. and Europe. 154 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:25,200 Right. Right. Who are your clients? 155 00:08:25,290 --> 00:08:27,070 Well, you know, it's not sexy stuff. 156 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:28,760 You might not know them by name, 157 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:31,890 but we have a giant farm equipment company. 158 00:08:31,960 --> 00:08:33,000 Who else have you got? 159 00:08:33,909 --> 00:08:37,350 Well, I've just started working with a company called Jeff's Cola. 160 00:08:37,419 --> 00:08:42,150 Oh, Jeff's Cola. Fuck, Sharon. 161 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:44,800 I think you might be in trouble here, it sounds like he's making this shit up. 162 00:08:45,580 --> 00:08:47,380 I know, it's a funny name but-- 163 00:08:47,460 --> 00:08:51,530 I'm just taking the piss. So, Rob, you got my sister pregnant. 164 00:08:52,350 --> 00:08:54,240 A lot of people get married in that situation. 165 00:08:54,500 --> 00:08:56,340 - What are you thinking? - We are getting married. 166 00:08:56,640 --> 00:08:58,750 Well, we're not. 167 00:08:59,110 --> 00:09:01,170 We are getting married, because I asked Sharon to marry me. 168 00:09:01,240 --> 00:09:03,090 Yeah, but not really. 169 00:09:03,160 --> 00:09:05,840 You know, it was more sort of jokey, you know, and a bit-- 170 00:09:05,920 --> 00:09:08,120 Anyway. Whatever. 171 00:09:09,500 --> 00:09:10,980 Don't tell Mum and Dad about any of this. 172 00:09:11,420 --> 00:09:14,120 Are you joking? This would kill them both. 173 00:09:14,950 --> 00:09:17,220 One funeral at a time here. Huh? 174 00:09:25,250 --> 00:09:28,130 - That was for these. - Congratulations. 175 00:09:28,970 --> 00:09:31,400 Why did you deny we were getting married back there? 176 00:09:31,690 --> 00:09:33,200 - I didn't really, did I? - You did. 177 00:09:33,370 --> 00:09:35,640 - You denied it repeatedly. - I don't know. 178 00:09:35,740 --> 00:09:37,940 - I'm embarrassed. - By me? 179 00:09:38,010 --> 00:09:40,480 No. Not by you, by me. 180 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:43,800 By my situation. There's just no dignity to it. 181 00:09:44,300 --> 00:09:46,800 It's like if a normal courtship's a dance, 182 00:09:46,870 --> 00:09:48,630 then ours is like a heart attack 183 00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:50,200 or a seizure or something. 184 00:09:50,520 --> 00:09:53,680 Our story sounds like a letter some sad sack wrote in to "Chat" magazine. 185 00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:57,740 - I don't know what that is. - It's a shit rag that idiots, 186 00:09:57,810 --> 00:09:59,740 and sometimes me, read so they can say, 187 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,480 "Well, thank fuck that isn't happening to me." 188 00:10:02,170 --> 00:10:03,470 Well, I get it. It's just that 189 00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:05,640 when I asked you to marry me, you said yes. 190 00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:07,540 I said fine, and there was no ring. 191 00:10:07,960 --> 00:10:09,840 - I'll get you a ring. - I don't need a-- 192 00:10:10,800 --> 00:10:12,180 I'm just worried that we're doing this 193 00:10:12,230 --> 00:10:14,680 because of the pregnancy and the visas 194 00:10:14,770 --> 00:10:16,810 and the not-cancer, and that's it. 195 00:10:17,270 --> 00:10:18,570 I mean, if you had any friends, 196 00:10:18,640 --> 00:10:21,120 they would be advising you not to jump into it like this. 197 00:10:21,200 --> 00:10:25,030 I know mine have. Seriously, has no-one told you just to slow it down? 198 00:10:25,920 --> 00:10:29,350 OK, well, let's slow it down. We'll add some dignity to this. 199 00:10:29,440 --> 00:10:31,200 Let's go to dinner Friday night. 200 00:10:31,260 --> 00:10:34,630 We can go to a nice restaurant and then go have sex in a park. 201 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:36,370 Does that sound nice? 202 00:10:37,110 --> 00:10:41,510 And if one of us brings up pregnancy or visas or pre-cancer or anything, 203 00:10:41,600 --> 00:10:44,100 then the other one can punch them in the face across the table. 204 00:10:44,740 --> 00:10:45,920 Okay. 205 00:10:47,560 --> 00:10:48,760 Did you like my brother? 206 00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:50,940 - Did I like him? - Yeah. 207 00:10:51,370 --> 00:10:52,400 No. 208 00:10:58,000 --> 00:11:00,520 Rob Norris, you're unreal, man. 209 00:11:00,590 --> 00:11:03,770 You're like an American sex wolf in London. 210 00:11:03,850 --> 00:11:07,270 You come over here, you fuck all the women, you get them pregnant. 211 00:11:07,720 --> 00:11:09,700 - It's just one woman. - Yeah, for now it is. 212 00:11:09,760 --> 00:11:11,680 You'll strike again. You'd better watch this one, honey. 213 00:11:11,740 --> 00:11:14,600 He'll get you pregnant just by looking at you with his dick! 214 00:11:15,990 --> 00:11:17,040 What's the matter with you? 215 00:11:17,110 --> 00:11:19,340 You hungry? You want some ice cream, some cookies? 216 00:11:19,420 --> 00:11:20,990 - No, thanks, I-- - Svetsana, would you get 217 00:11:21,060 --> 00:11:22,350 some of those cookies I made before? 218 00:11:22,410 --> 00:11:24,390 You're going to love these, man. They're gluten-free. 219 00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:26,930 You'll think you'll taste gluten but there isn't any. 220 00:11:27,770 --> 00:11:31,240 - Wow! - Now, have you thought about-- 221 00:11:31,850 --> 00:11:34,240 Killing Sharon? You know, I thought about it-- 222 00:11:34,290 --> 00:11:35,990 No, I mean, getting rid of the-- 223 00:11:36,080 --> 00:11:38,180 Yeah, no, we're not going to do that. 224 00:11:38,790 --> 00:11:40,880 Actually, we're getting married. 225 00:11:41,650 --> 00:11:44,680 Wow! Have you asked her yet? 226 00:11:44,750 --> 00:11:49,600 Well, yeah, I asked her, but I've got to do it again, 'cause-- Thank you. 227 00:11:50,480 --> 00:11:52,520 The first time was kind of seat of the pants 228 00:11:52,610 --> 00:11:54,220 and I didn't have a ring, so-- 229 00:11:54,290 --> 00:11:56,970 Whoa! She's making you propose twice? 230 00:11:57,050 --> 00:12:00,290 - No, she's not making me. I want to. - No, you don't. 231 00:12:00,380 --> 00:12:04,080 Listen, after you leave, I'm going to fuck her, 232 00:12:04,170 --> 00:12:05,710 and then she's going to leave. 233 00:12:06,070 --> 00:12:09,300 - And that's pretty great! - That is great for you. 234 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:11,910 For me, a different thing is great. 235 00:12:12,130 --> 00:12:13,590 Okay, well, suit yourself. 236 00:12:14,060 --> 00:12:15,940 But listen, if that's what you want to do, 237 00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,120 then at least don't waste any money on the wedding. 238 00:12:18,500 --> 00:12:20,900 You know, my outfit, we helped to refinance Euro Disney. 239 00:12:20,980 --> 00:12:22,400 I can get your honeymoon there for free. 240 00:12:22,490 --> 00:12:24,380 She'll shit! You said she's Irish? 241 00:12:24,450 --> 00:12:25,960 She'll think she's in fucking heaven. 242 00:12:30,740 --> 00:12:32,290 Oh, God, am I late? I thought-- 243 00:12:32,370 --> 00:12:35,340 No, no, I'm early. I thought if I got here early, 244 00:12:35,410 --> 00:12:36,430 they'd see that I'm the kind of woman 245 00:12:36,500 --> 00:12:37,950 who doesn't deserve pre-cancer. 246 00:12:38,150 --> 00:12:39,480 - That makes sense. - Yeah. 247 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,710 Okay, so-- 248 00:12:44,800 --> 00:12:47,200 I see you have cervical dysplasia. 249 00:12:47,450 --> 00:12:50,340 Well, we were hoping to get a second opinion on that, 250 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,250 - because I've heard-- - No, I'm sure you have it. 251 00:12:55,690 --> 00:12:57,730 Uh, aren't you going to have a look? 252 00:12:57,920 --> 00:13:01,600 We will look, but that doesn't really get misdiagnosed. 253 00:13:01,660 --> 00:13:05,990 You have it or you don't. It's not like ADHD or fibromyalgia, 254 00:13:06,050 --> 00:13:08,660 which are kind of, like, up to you if have them or not. 255 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:10,940 No, it's a real-deal thing. 256 00:13:11,090 --> 00:13:13,000 - Fibromyalgia isn't real? - Rob! 257 00:13:13,060 --> 00:13:16,130 The other doctor said that I could have the procedure now 258 00:13:16,200 --> 00:13:19,960 and jeopardize the pregnancy, or I could wait and have it after I deliver. 259 00:13:20,020 --> 00:13:22,500 OK, well, then, I'm glad you did come in, then, 260 00:13:22,570 --> 00:13:25,930 because here's some good news. The trauma of vaginal birth 261 00:13:26,010 --> 00:13:31,040 can just blow all the cancer out as the baby and stuff comes out. 262 00:13:31,730 --> 00:13:33,730 - Baby and stuff? - Oh, yes. 263 00:13:33,800 --> 00:13:35,310 Yeah, all kinds of stuff comes out. 264 00:13:35,410 --> 00:13:38,520 You're lucky, it's just the one baby and some bad cells. 265 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:41,380 Could be triplets No, thanks, right? 266 00:13:42,020 --> 00:13:47,280 The birth process does take a proper scrubbing brush to the old cervix 267 00:13:47,340 --> 00:13:50,100 and can just remove all the creepy-crawlies, 268 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:52,500 the dysplasia, making surgery unnecessary. 269 00:13:53,760 --> 00:13:54,780 Wow. 270 00:13:55,080 --> 00:13:56,130 Okay. 271 00:13:56,210 --> 00:13:59,000 So, I would strongly recommend against the surgery, 272 00:13:59,070 --> 00:14:01,000 since, you know, it could induce labor. 273 00:14:01,080 --> 00:14:02,810 And we really do not want that, do we? 274 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:04,790 No. 275 00:14:05,360 --> 00:14:08,390 Okay, I mean, how does that all sound? 276 00:14:08,620 --> 00:14:12,520 Is that, you know, second-opiniony enough for you? 277 00:14:20,840 --> 00:14:22,050 I'm not smoking it. 278 00:14:26,750 --> 00:14:28,890 Fucking 250 quid that cost! 279 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:31,910 Well, I mean, he did say he doesn't recommend surgery. 280 00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:35,490 Yeah, he also said, "Think of it like a specter hanging over your pregnancy." 281 00:14:35,580 --> 00:14:39,130 What is that? The fucking occult? Like "Rosemary's Baby"? 282 00:14:39,200 --> 00:14:41,960 No, he just meant, like, a black cloud or something, 283 00:14:42,040 --> 00:14:43,680 you know, out of a cauldron. 284 00:14:44,820 --> 00:14:46,600 Christ, what a mess. 285 00:14:47,090 --> 00:14:48,760 What a messy mess. 286 00:14:49,430 --> 00:14:51,440 Yeah, it is. 287 00:14:55,170 --> 00:14:58,190 You know, I think someone should say-- 288 00:14:58,240 --> 00:14:59,670 and it's going to be me-- 289 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:01,570 You don't have to do this. 290 00:15:02,110 --> 00:15:04,510 You know, you've been really kind just coming over here 291 00:15:04,580 --> 00:15:06,480 and helping out, and I really appreciate it, 292 00:15:06,530 --> 00:15:09,740 but it's not the 1930s, you know? 293 00:15:10,130 --> 00:15:11,540 I can do this on my own. 294 00:15:11,920 --> 00:15:13,820 I don't get the sense that you can. 295 00:15:14,620 --> 00:15:16,480 Or, you know what, you probably could. 296 00:15:16,570 --> 00:15:18,480 Women raise kids on their own all the time. 297 00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:22,460 But what about when you want to take a shit or get a haircut? 298 00:15:22,650 --> 00:15:26,440 And independent of that, can you, for a second, accept the fact 299 00:15:26,530 --> 00:15:29,440 that I like you and want to be with you, you fucking idiot? 300 00:15:32,540 --> 00:15:35,020 Well, thank fuck for that, because I really can't do this on my own. 301 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:37,920 I really can't! I can tell you now, I cannot do this. 302 00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:40,070 Plus, we're going to do our date. 303 00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:41,380 You're goddamn right we are. 304 00:15:42,820 --> 00:15:44,870 Okay, well, text me the details. 305 00:15:46,190 --> 00:15:47,830 Going to go and teach some kids about the plague. 306 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:49,960 - What are you doing? - Same. 307 00:15:58,610 --> 00:16:00,500 Please, don't embarrass either of us 308 00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,200 by asking for permission to marry my sister. 309 00:16:02,270 --> 00:16:05,590 Okay, I just wanted to let you know that I'm serious about this, 310 00:16:05,640 --> 00:16:07,550 and it's not just because I got her pregnant. 311 00:16:07,630 --> 00:16:09,920 I'm not blind, man. I saw the way you were looking at her. 312 00:16:10,000 --> 00:16:11,050 You're fucked. 313 00:16:11,130 --> 00:16:13,720 - Your cappuccino. - Oh, thank you. 314 00:16:14,650 --> 00:16:17,060 Why are you having a cappuccino in a jewelry shop? 315 00:16:17,290 --> 00:16:19,200 Well, I think because I'm potentially about 316 00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:22,030 to spend a bit of dough here. They're trying to butter me up. 317 00:16:22,500 --> 00:16:24,120 This was the last one we were looking at. 318 00:16:24,390 --> 00:16:28,140 - Yes, I think this is the one. - It's a beautiful ring. 319 00:16:28,540 --> 00:16:30,600 If you'd like to follow me, Mr. Norris. 320 00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:32,430 Marie will bring your cappuccino. 321 00:16:33,610 --> 00:16:34,860 How much is that fucking thing? 322 00:16:35,310 --> 00:16:37,520 It's 2,000 pounds almost. 323 00:16:37,600 --> 00:16:40,140 It's a lot, but I want to do this. 324 00:16:40,840 --> 00:16:43,300 - May I get you a glass of wine? - No, you may not. 325 00:16:44,540 --> 00:16:47,390 Looking at countries, cities, population-- 326 00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:50,090 Anyone that comes up with flags gets an extra point. 327 00:16:51,680 --> 00:16:54,840 Hi, yeah, there's going to be a fire drill in ten minutes. 328 00:16:54,890 --> 00:16:58,200 Okay. Are you okay? 329 00:16:58,280 --> 00:17:00,900 Yeah. No, I just-- I was just thinking 330 00:17:00,980 --> 00:17:03,270 about what you said the other day, 331 00:17:03,350 --> 00:17:05,760 and I can't do this on my own. 332 00:17:05,849 --> 00:17:07,310 - I do need a man. - Can we maybe just-- 333 00:17:07,390 --> 00:17:08,720 And that doesn't mean I'm not a feminist. 334 00:17:08,800 --> 00:17:10,130 I just need a person to help me, 335 00:17:10,190 --> 00:17:11,800 and the person who wants to help me happens to be a man. 336 00:17:11,859 --> 00:17:13,339 - Fine. - I don't care if it's the 2000s. 337 00:17:13,400 --> 00:17:15,550 I got home last night and he'd made me a frittata. 338 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:16,619 - Do you know what that is? - Mm-hmm. 339 00:17:16,690 --> 00:17:18,260 It's an eggs thing. It was extremely tasty, 340 00:17:18,349 --> 00:17:20,109 and if that's the kind of behavior I can expect, 341 00:17:20,170 --> 00:17:23,740 then I definitely want him around, okay? 342 00:17:23,819 --> 00:17:26,200 - Okay. - Okay, I'll let you get on. 343 00:17:28,900 --> 00:17:31,720 Any weekend plans? 344 00:17:31,850 --> 00:17:34,040 Well, aside from asking my fiancée 345 00:17:34,110 --> 00:17:36,580 to marry me again, I don't know. 346 00:17:36,660 --> 00:17:37,790 You know, we might go to the park. 347 00:17:37,860 --> 00:17:38,940 We were thinking we might-- 348 00:17:39,180 --> 00:17:40,900 Wait-- What does that say? 349 00:17:42,460 --> 00:17:43,970 Well, it says 25,000 pounds. 350 00:17:44,050 --> 00:17:45,380 Okay. 351 00:17:45,480 --> 00:17:47,510 Is that tax or-- What's going on? 352 00:17:47,740 --> 00:17:50,150 - The ring is 25,000 pounds. - No, no, no, no. 353 00:17:50,460 --> 00:17:54,300 On the tag it said 1980, which is less. 354 00:17:55,750 --> 00:17:59,490 Marie, will you bring the ring from the first drawer, the Jill Solomon band? 355 00:18:05,220 --> 00:18:06,560 Any weekend plans? 356 00:18:07,380 --> 00:18:10,940 The rings are so close together in the case. 357 00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:12,940 I'm not saying that you tried to trick me or-- 358 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:16,270 Okay, yeah, I see the mistake. 359 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:17,820 This is a classier ring. 360 00:18:17,900 --> 00:18:20,820 This is petiter, this is more Sharon, don't you think? 361 00:18:20,910 --> 00:18:24,110 I like the other ring, but I don't know. 362 00:18:24,170 --> 00:18:27,440 I mean, it's hard to say. I mean, this is more vulgar. 363 00:18:28,280 --> 00:18:31,120 I like the clarity of the stones, right? 364 00:18:31,180 --> 00:18:34,850 But this is-- You can see where this is. 365 00:18:35,040 --> 00:18:38,520 You put them side by side, it's not even a contest. 366 00:18:38,650 --> 00:18:42,180 Yeah, this I'm going to go with this one. 367 00:18:55,160 --> 00:18:56,520 - Hey, Mom. - Listen to me. 368 00:18:56,660 --> 00:18:58,780 Susan Greenberg's husband, Mitchell, 369 00:18:58,830 --> 00:19:00,230 he's a custody lawyer, 370 00:19:00,300 --> 00:19:03,880 and he says what you absolutely cannot do 371 00:19:03,940 --> 00:19:05,290 is marry this girl. 372 00:19:05,630 --> 00:19:08,130 The U.K. and the U.S., they have this agreement, 373 00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:12,400 which is called "the reciprocal enforcement." 374 00:19:12,700 --> 00:19:15,430 I can't hear you, I'm going into a tunnel. 375 00:19:15,490 --> 00:19:18,160 Oh, come on! You're going to ruin your life! 376 00:19:18,740 --> 00:19:19,780 Fucker. 377 00:19:21,500 --> 00:19:22,880 - Hey. - Oh, hi. 378 00:19:24,670 --> 00:19:27,580 - I'm sorry I'm late. - Did you say sorry? 379 00:19:27,650 --> 00:19:29,540 It's just I can't hear myself fart in here. 380 00:19:29,620 --> 00:19:32,720 My friend Dave said this was his favorite place for an intimate dinner. 381 00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:35,180 Really? I never want to ever meet him. 382 00:19:35,240 --> 00:19:38,840 There's a balcony where you can get a 360-degree view of the city. 383 00:19:42,910 --> 00:19:45,420 Sorry, sorry, can you just-- 384 00:19:45,560 --> 00:19:47,360 - What? - You just spilt my wine. 385 00:19:47,810 --> 00:19:50,150 - You want another wine? - No, no. 386 00:19:50,220 --> 00:19:53,680 Just maybe mop it up or say "oops" or smile at me? 387 00:19:53,760 --> 00:19:56,120 I can't hear what you're saying. Are you ready to order? 388 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,080 - Can I get a coke? - These tables are for food. 389 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:01,160 Yep, and we're going to eat food, after we have our drinks. 390 00:20:04,690 --> 00:20:07,380 I should probably tell you I also got her pregnant. 391 00:20:07,460 --> 00:20:10,110 - That's why she's acting that way. - Swedish whore. 392 00:20:10,190 --> 00:20:12,420 She's just upset because she's 6'8" 393 00:20:12,500 --> 00:20:14,820 and a bunch of guys have already tried to climb her tonight. 394 00:20:16,730 --> 00:20:18,500 Good. I'm glad! 395 00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:21,780 Your boobs look huge in that dress! 396 00:20:21,880 --> 00:20:23,190 If you'd had those when we met, 397 00:20:23,410 --> 00:20:24,880 I would have got you double pregnant. 398 00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:27,480 - Thank you. - Listen, if I play my cards right 399 00:20:27,550 --> 00:20:30,330 tonight, would you consider smothering me with them? 400 00:20:32,070 --> 00:20:36,350 Well, you know, it's not out of the question, I suppose. 401 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:39,890 - We should head up to that balcony - Bobby, baby! 402 00:20:39,960 --> 00:20:42,910 Did I tell you this place was the shit or what? 403 00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:45,570 - What is what is that? - That is Dave. 404 00:20:45,650 --> 00:20:47,100 Hey, Dave, why are you here? 405 00:20:47,190 --> 00:20:48,370 Well, I wanted to meet this little 406 00:20:48,430 --> 00:20:50,610 - English enchantress of yours. - Irish. 407 00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:53,880 Oh, sorry, British. I'm just fucking with you. 408 00:20:54,440 --> 00:20:57,480 Do you mind if we join you? Have you tried the chili margaritas? 409 00:20:57,550 --> 00:20:59,600 Let me get Anico. Anico, come on! 410 00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:05,500 And Rob had his shirt on, but no bottom and no underpants, 411 00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:09,720 and the girl who was on his shoulders was naked. 412 00:21:11,080 --> 00:21:15,330 Oh, this is before Rob decided he had alcoholism when he was still fun. 413 00:21:15,390 --> 00:21:17,610 I'm just going to go to the bathroom. 414 00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:21,560 So, Dave if you're gone when I get back, nice to meet you. 415 00:21:23,230 --> 00:21:25,160 - Nice to meet you... - Elithra. 416 00:21:26,010 --> 00:21:27,200 That's fantastic. 417 00:21:28,950 --> 00:21:33,140 She is something! Can we have two more of these? 418 00:21:33,460 --> 00:21:35,380 Oh, for fuck's sake! 419 00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:42,800 - Oh, where are you going? - I'll be right back. 420 00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:46,970 - I'm going home. - You can't go. 421 00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:48,060 I wanted to show you the view because-- 422 00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:49,490 No, I don't want to go back in there. 423 00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,550 I just want to go home. Please, I'm sorry. 424 00:21:52,100 --> 00:21:55,810 - Okay, let's get out of here. - Yeah? 425 00:21:56,880 --> 00:21:59,690 You know, he visibly had cocaine around both his nostrils? 426 00:22:00,290 --> 00:22:02,230 Where are we going? I don't want to walk. 427 00:22:02,320 --> 00:22:03,470 The Tube's back there! 428 00:22:04,040 --> 00:22:07,840 Listen, I'm sorry that tonight has turned to shit-- 429 00:22:07,930 --> 00:22:09,150 - What? - ...but I wanted to-- 430 00:22:12,070 --> 00:22:14,130 Do you mind? 431 00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:15,960 I wanted to propose to you properly. 432 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:17,100 Oh, look, it's one of those taxi guys! 433 00:22:17,180 --> 00:22:19,970 - Fuck! Jesus Christ! - What are you doing? 434 00:22:20,040 --> 00:22:21,280 - Shut up! - What? 435 00:22:21,350 --> 00:22:24,100 I just need you to just stand over there, quiet, for a moment. 436 00:22:24,170 --> 00:22:27,740 - I'm sorry. - Seriously, what are you doing? 437 00:22:28,030 --> 00:22:32,620 Oh, thank Christ! Are you fucking kidding me? 438 00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:40,040 Hey, mental person, are we getting in with this guy or-- 439 00:22:42,210 --> 00:22:43,800 - What is that? - It's a ring. 440 00:22:44,270 --> 00:22:46,770 It's an engagement ring. I wanted to propose to you 441 00:22:46,850 --> 00:22:48,910 properly at the restaurant with a view, 442 00:22:49,020 --> 00:22:52,290 a 360-degree view, and then here by the river. 443 00:22:52,370 --> 00:22:54,830 Then you knocked the ring in the road like an animal 444 00:22:55,650 --> 00:22:57,160 and then this woman pissed on it. 445 00:23:04,530 --> 00:23:05,700 You can ask me now. 446 00:23:07,060 --> 00:23:11,060 - Well, I don't want to now. - Okay. What about now? 447 00:23:16,260 --> 00:23:17,280 Will you marry me? 448 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:22,900 Fine. Yes. 449 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:27,920 - No, don't do that. There's piss on it. - Shit, I'm sorry. 450 00:23:29,670 --> 00:23:31,190 Hang on, wait, give us a look. 451 00:23:33,780 --> 00:23:34,850 It's pretty. 452 00:23:35,340 --> 00:23:37,920 Well, you know, I narrowed it down to two, 453 00:23:38,000 --> 00:23:40,750 but the other one was, you know, was more vulgar, it was stupid. 454 00:23:40,820 --> 00:23:42,690 This one's, you know, it's petiter. 455 00:23:42,760 --> 00:23:45,640 - Whoa! Let me wipe it off first. - No, don't be silly. 456 00:23:46,030 --> 00:23:47,200 It's just a bit of piss. 457 00:23:57,110 --> 00:23:58,260 I love it!